Sugar Shocked!

Well, 5 years or so off of sugar will make one happy to be alive. No wonder I have been over a decade without taking pills, alcohol or even needing to see the doctor!
Something in me decided to try again, to explore adding in sugar. And bread and milk and cheese. Oh my. Having been full-on gluten free vegan for many years, this was a crash course in what I call: "How not to eat". My mantra right now is: oops, I've done it again. And my affirmation is: I have been here before and I am going to make it. I feel crazy, but my coach reminded me of simple wisdom: "A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step" --Lao Tse, yet it never says in what direction. There is no good or bad food, it all just is. Just as our energy is constantly expanding and contracting, so is life.

I may not be where I would like my body to be, but I am ok with it. I heard recently someone referring to a glitch in American culture is that we "ain't ever satisfied". Seriously, in Los Angeles, you don't see many people staying at home, they're all in their car trying to get someone, to improve themselves, to be better, richer, fitter and ultimately, more human. A part of our condition is to want to improve upon who we are, what we know, how we live. Isn't knowledge key to our development? A former client, who is a chiropractor in New York sent out a newsletter this month with a definition of radiant health being resilientcy and pro-active self development. This resonates fully with me where I am now.

I may be making mistakes, but I am taking my life back from a limited viewpoint. I may have put on more weight than I am comfortable with, but I keep coming back to my yoga mat and accepting myself where I am now. I may have cravings for sugar, and really to be bad. But I am making a commitment to have limits with myself. There are many reasons that I want to take care of myself, but most importantly is because I want to learn and experience life to the best of my ability and I function better when I eat well.I am about to begin the final section of my bachelor's degree in psychology. I have a few months left before I finish my coaching training and I am 1/3 way complete with a yoga teacher training. I want the energy and focus that I know is available to me when I prioritize my self care.

I know that as I take care of myself, that I inspire others to do the same. I asked a new friend who is in treatment with anorexia yesterday, who would you be if you were not concerned about your body and food all of the time? This inspired me to answer it in my own life. Recovery is not about finding what is wrong about ourselves, but going inwards to discover the fruits of our remarkable resolve lies deep within our heart. Our heart is a part of a global heart, and by resting peacefully within, we offer a blessing to the planet. Recovery is about living in the middle, connecting with our values and living from a place of serenity. Like I said before, I will do what will not have to be undone. There are so many ways to say: Take care of yourself today for a better tomorrow.

Here are some commitments I am making to my life and to my recovery, for the benefit of past, present and future friends, family and clients:

I will do what won't be undone, and that starts with how I treat my body.
I will eat as if in full view of others.
No matter what, I will not eat sugar. You will be the first to hear about it when I want to, and I will trust that nothing is bad enough to face and everything is better when I am free from mental and physical angst that sugar induces.
I will do my best to take care of my needs better each day.

I wish you a peaceful heart, strength and courage and resiliency, for the wisdom to start where you are loving yourself as never before.

Shanti,
Waller